Before entering a country with strict rules imposed on liquor, most of the 'drinkers' on board tend to 'stock up' on their alcohol within the few hours they are on board the air craft; which by the way is not good use of common sense as at 30,000 ft, the human body can take only up to half of your normal intake.

Also as many passengers don’t take dehydration or low oxygen levels into account, they simply just get hammered. Most of the time, crew members try to adhere to the airline policies of serving alcohol to the customers, and try the text book methods of not letting passengers get intoxicated. However in practicality it is not an easy task, as happy customers mean a lot when you are trapped with them for the next few good hours inside a plane.

There was, this time, a notorious passenger who travels the same league frequently with us. He walks up to the front galley and downs a couple of drinks, and walks down to the back galley and does the same. As he appeared to be tipsy I asked him his seat number, saying we are out of his preferred choice in the front galley, and I would bring it down to his seat from the other. However, his seat number implied that he was already from the aft of the aircraft and had been strolling up and down quite a bit in the hope of getting 'happy' which he accomplished.

As his smart plan was revealed to the other crew, he came down to the back galley, and asked for another drink. He was denied of any more alcohol, so he made his way up to the front. Unfortunately for him, in hopes of getting the attention of the crew member who was busy preparing for the service, he poked her. 

One thing you should never do is touch or poke an airhostess unless it is a friendly handshake. It can lead up to a series of misunderstandings, and eventually jail time. However most of us airhostesses know only too well that in many cultures poking or making an annoying “Psssssst” noise is the way for some to get our attention. Thus, though annoyed to be poked at, she asked him irritably “Yes sir what do you need?”  He replied “Sister...any hot drinks?” (Many passengers onboard refer to alcohol as hot drinks), “Sorry sir. I am the only child and I have no brothers! Do you want tea or coffee?”

Perplexed with this answer, he goes “Ah okay... Are there any biting items?” This was too much for the crew member to bear on top of the service, being poked at,  called sister by a man who was old enough to be her grandfather, and asked for hot drinks and now biting items! With a stern look on her face she asked, “Yes sir. How about my neck sir?” At that, he returned to his seat and dozed off, napping till he had to get off.

Dany