The Older Man Syndrome

May 28 2012.

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What is it about young women and men in their 30s? I’m not speaking about age gaps that are about 15 or 20 years (that’s just cradle snatching), I’m speaking about those gaps of 5 or 8 years (and maybe 10), what is with that? When we were young innocent school girls anything above 3 years was considered too old and now when we are in our 20’s we seek that well... ‘older man’.

“Girl’s go for older men because almost all of them seek for that father-figure,” says 33 year old Azim. Well that’s often true in most cases, while boys want a girl like their mother; girls want someone like their father to marry. It’s psychological. In a close tight knit family, a girl’s strongest male influence is her father or brothers. Eventually she will marry someone who reflects most of their characteristics.

“The thing is I don’t get it. How can you introduce your 32 year old boyfriend to your 25 year old friends? Isn’t that weird? Can all of you have great time out together? What would he possibly have in common with them?” asks 24 year old Randir quizzically. “Anything beyond three years is too old” he adds definitely.

Well that’s there too, the “friend” factor. However, most girls who have the older man syndrome are looking for a life partner and they know they’ll always have their (good) friends, but they want someone secure to come back home too.

“I think it’s because boys our own age are immature, “adds 24 year old Ashika cautiously. “Don’t get me wrong, but looking long term, I want somebody who can take care of me. so I guess that’s where the ‘older man’ concept fits in”.

Although she isn’t far from the truth, the problem really isn’t with the boys our age; its science. Girls mature faster than boys and rarely do you find a guy your own age that has that kind of maturity.

According to Steve Harvey’s much acclaimed book “Act like a Lady, Think like a Man” , two biological qualities men have is to “provide” and to “protect” their women, so I guess when one of these innate traits are overtly lacking, lasses will tend to look somewhere else. Or more towards someone elder than her who has them. After all with age comes wisdom.

But apparently that’s not only it. “Why girls prefer older men? Isn’t it obvious?” asks 24 year old Rukshika. “They are sexy” she adds with a wink.  Now that makes more sense. No wonder most of us are diagnosed with this disorder. Let me make it a little clearer for the confused chaps: See we girls all love Legolas (Orlando Bloom) from LOTR (Lord of the Rings) but its Aragorn (Viggo Mortensen) we want to take to bed.

 

 

 

(Shazzana Hamid)

 

 

 

 



0 Comments

  1. Amanda De Silva says:

    My boyfriend is 34 and i'm 22. we couldn't be happier. we love each other very much and i know he's the man i'm going to marry. Older men are way more mature and don't take life as a joke.

  2. Ruvina says:

    I dont' think age really matters when it comes to the affairs of the heart. As long as you can connect to him, feel comfortable with him then he should be THE guy. At the end of the day, a woman needs a man who will be there for her, who will love her for who she is and support her through life.

  3. Nish says:

    I agree. I'm nineteen and my guy is 31 years old but he does take care of me and is a fatherly figure to me. I don't think the age gap matters because comparing with guys of my age i can say he is more matured and more reliable in an affair. I've been in love with him for four years and it keeps on getting better. Most of the time people look down on couples with such age gaps but i know he's the one i want to marry.

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