If there’s one thing all Sri Lankans can agree on, it’s this: our parents are in a league of their own. They’re equal parts hilarious, resourceful, and frustratingly lovable. In sports, MVP stands for “Most Valuable Player”—the one who outshines everyone else. But in life, Sri Lankan parents are the real MVPs. From their unmatched dedication to keeping furniture spotless to their unwavering belief in homemade remedies, they prove time and again that they’re the stars of our lives. Here’s a light-hearted tribute to everything that makes them special—and downright iconic.

1. The Legendary Plastic-Covered Furniture (and Remote Covers!)

No Sri Lankan household is complete without plastic-covered furniture. Sofas, dining chairs, sometimes even mattresses—our parents are determined to preserve that “brand-new” look forever. Sure, it’s noisy and uncomfortable to sit on, especially in Colombo’s heat, but it’s a non-negotiable house rule.

And it doesn’t stop with furniture! Television remotes are another prized possession. Wrapped tightly in plastic (sometimes multiple layers), these remotes are more secure than a newborn. The plastic is there to protect them from dust, grime, and apparently life itself. By the time the plastic starts peeling off, instead of discarding it, they’ll just add another layer for good measure. If you dare suggest removing the plastic, you’ll be met with a look of pure disbelief: “Do you want to ruin it?”

2. The Biscuit Tin Surprise

Who hasn’t experienced this classic Sri Lankan prank? You spot a tin of Danish butter cookies and get excited, only to open it and find sewing supplies, buttons, or something equally unrelated to snacks. It’s a rite of passage in every Sri Lankan home. Over time, you learn not to trust biscuit tins, but you still open them every now and then—just in case.

3. “I’ll Just Keep This for Later” Syndrome

Sri Lankan parents are the ultimate hoarders, though they prefer to call it “being prepared.” Leftover rice? Freeze it. Wedding cake? Freeze it. That random piece of string? Save it; you might need it someday. Their cupboards and fridges are like treasure troves, filled with items you’ll never use but can’t throw away because “you never know.”

4. The Magical Home Remedies

Before Google and WebMD, there were Sri Lankan parents. They have a remedy for every ailment, whether it’s a cold, headache, or upset stomach. Got a fever? Boil coriander seeds and drink the water. Sore throat? Gargle with salt water. Feeling tired? Eat some kurakkan (millet). While you may doubt their methods, they’re usually right—so you reluctantly take that herbal concoction and end up feeling better.

5. The Never-Ending Lecture About the Electricity Bill

“Do you think we own the CEB?” is a rhetorical question every Sri Lankan child has heard. If you leave a light on in an empty room, you’re bound to get an earful about wasting electricity and how expensive the bill is. They’re so passionate about energy conservation that you might start switching off fans and lights out of fear rather than habit.

6. The Matchmaking Expertise

Sri Lankan parents have a sixth sense when it comes to matchmaking. They don’t need Tinder or dating apps—they have their own network of aunties, uncles, and family friends. Whether it’s at weddings, funerals, or temple events, they’re always scouting potential matches. “There’s this boy I heard about. He’s a doctor. Shall we check the horoscope?” If you’re single and over 25, this conversation is inevitable.

7. Their Love for Stockpiling

If you’ve ever wondered why Sri Lankan households have enough milk powder to survive a year, it’s because our parents are expert stockpilers. They’ll buy things in bulk, especially during promotions, “just in case.” The pantry is always overflowing with lentils, tinned fish, and spices. And during a lockdown or economic crisis? They’re the calmest people in the room because they’ve been preparing for this moment their entire lives.

8. The “Always Eat at Home” Rule

Thinking of eating out? Forget it. “Why waste money when we have rice and curry at home?” is the mantra of every Sri Lankan parent. Even if it’s leftovers from three days ago, they’ll insist it’s perfectly good and you’re being ungrateful. Special occasions like a birthday might warrant a treat, but anything beyond that is seen as frivolous.

9. Their Undying Support

At the end of the day, no one has your back like Sri Lankan parents. They may nag you about your career, your marriage, and everything in between, but their love is unconditional. Whether it’s waking up at 4 a.m. to make you a cup of tea before an exam or driving across the city to drop off something you forgot, their actions speak louder than their words. They might not say “I love you” often, but their support shows it in a million little ways.

Sri Lankan parents might drive us crazy with their quirks, but they’re also the reason our homes feel so full of life. Their mix of tough love, old-school wisdom, and unparalleled resourcefulness makes them truly one of a kind. We laugh at their antics, but we also know we’ll be just like them someday—and honestly, we wouldn’t have it any other way.