Growing up I was never one of those overtly maternal girls. Like any little girl whose played house I remember times spent watching my friends conspiring on who they would marry and how many children they would have.

So of course it was more of a surprise to everyone as well as myself that I ended up with a house full of children.

The oldest entered our lives with great drama and delight, drama since it was a difficult delivery where we could have lost her and delight because my husband and I being first time parents fell hopelessly in love with this little bundle of arms and legs that screamed a lot.

We definitely paid our dues as first time parents, for our little bundle of joy’s every whim was catered for and during those  days we saw little sleep and even an undisturbed five minute shower was a luxury.

Then our son came along and with him peace and harmony entered the house, he exhumed such a chilled out personality that we all took refuge in his calmness.

The years rolled on and we became, as we thought better parents, we were in control until of course our lives were once again rocked by the entrance of the younger mischievous two.

Despite my friends forever teasing me on when the next one is due, with four children I believe I am done with adding to my family and now I am faced with the daunting task of raising these complicated characters.

Life with kids is not for the faint hearted. There are ups and downs and if you cherish your independence then I seriously advice you to think twice before you depart on this journey.

I cannot remember the last time my husband and I spontaneously decided to go out for dinner; our every action is planned in a military style operation.

Family vacations never really tend to be vacations for us two, for we are too busy managing kids in not a familiar environment.

Then my days tend to get filled with cajoling children from meal to meal, engaging in elaborate conversations as to why teddy doesn’t need a bath or partaking in UN style peace keep negotiating sessions over who pulled whose hair.

Despite the constant chaos, or the grubby fingerprints on the white washed walls or the lack of privacy or the inability to have an undisturbed conversation with anyone, I wouldn’t change any aspect of it.

I could never go back to calmness or quietness, for the happy noise is now a very part of me. My children have changed me forever. When they are gone for even an hour or two, I miss them. I miss the constant chatter and the giggling laughter as they play together.

Despite our threats to vacation alone, my husband and I cannot fathom enjoying anything without them. The advantage of having a large family is that we constantly keep ourselves entertained; we’ve usually got our very own party going.

The house is loud, it’s chaotic, there will be a fight happening somewhere but it’s all harmless and forgotten in a minute.

So my musings on family life are to encourage those who are faltering on whether to start a family, if you ever make another bad decision for the rest of your life, that decision to become parents will be the best one you will ever make.

Also a word of comfort to those already with children and knee deep in it, don’t stress that you’re not at the latest party or you don’t have time for a social life, if you’re looking for a “happening” scene, don’t look no further than your family around you, you’re living life to the fullest being with them and the love they surround you is wholesomely long-lasting. 

By Mayuri Jayasinghe