Another birthday looms and I am feeling reminiscent. The two's have really been a turning point in my life. As I think back I have accomplished a great many things this year to the extent in which I must say without question I fall in the category of “a genius”. Not sure why no one singled me out for any sort of award but as usual there are haters out there. Okay you seem hesitant to accept my sudden shift into intellectual supremity, so let me enlighten you. The biggie of course was the whole walking thing. Yes that was a bit difficult, I kept toppling over banging bits of body, couldn't walk in a straight line and somehow the furniture kept trying to stop me from going places since I always seem to be banging into stuff. Also Mother darling didn't take to kindly to the walking thing, the “ooh's” and “ahh's” at my sudden accomplishment lasted a good half an hour, by which I had broken her Grandma's heirloom vase to smithereens, ripped out the fern she had been trying to grow for months and decided to tear out a very expensive coffee table book on architectural design.

Yes the eventual happened,  I was caged and my only walking was confined to the four walls of my fiery red playpen. There were also other things I could do that infuriated Mother dearest. Case and point, she would spend a good forty five minutes squeezing, tugging, buttoning me into the latest cutest outfit that had been sent  by her mother in law, only for me to remove every piece of clothing  five minutes before Dragon Lady was due...or that's another clever thing I can do, I can repeat back words or phrases that people say. Somehow saying “Dragon Lady”, which Mum uses in private, around Daddy's mummy always seens to have Mother all hot and bothered and laughing quite nervously. The word “why” is my absolutely favourite word, by using it consistently and repetitively I can cause a completely harmless innocent grown up to be banging their heads on the wall in a matter of a few minutes.

Yesterday I used the word “why” about five thousand, four hundred and thirty times. Mummy needed an extra glass of adult grape juice, as she calls it after that bothersome afternoon especially after the visit with Dragon Lady. Yes there are other accomplishments, like I now tend to sleep through the night, it makes mum happy but whatevers!!!!...., but I guess as the dawn of another new year arises, there is more to accomplish...potty training intrigues me, why pee in a potty when Mummy's plant needs some watering!

By Mayuri Jayasinghe