After a hazardous day of parenting there’s nothing more I look forward to than a nice bath followed by a huge steaming cup of green tea. Of course for my moments of relaxation to be a success it is imperative that it is childfree for the little busy bodies have to be tucked up in bed smelling of roses and dreaming of all the mischievousness they will get up to the next day.

Oblivious of time and commitments I cherish those moments of freedom, as a parent you will understand my need for that cup of green tea. Just like we have our requirements for relaxing at the end of the day so do our children. My son, when he was younger, demanded that his little teddy accompanied him when going to bed, it was scruffy, missing a leg, but to him it was his best buddy and many a screaming fit was waged if teddy went lost.

The other’s equally had their own requirements, soothers, baby dolls, piles of books have all followed sleepyheads to bed. Even now my littlest one still requires her soother to help lull her to sleep. What do you do though, when the thumb sucking, soother addiction, dirty blankey requirement goes out of control. When you child cannot go to bed without either of them. It is important that we devise a plan of action when the time comes for to rid them of their comforting toys and friends is to wage a battle of wills where you will be the exhausted looser.

Psychologists have theorized that a baby between the ages of 4 to 6 months develops an attachment to a comfort object as a way of letting go from their mothers. The new object acts as a substitute for loosing that attachment to the mothers. For as babies get older other carer’s come on to the scene and sometimes the mother’s involvement is reduced. The child uses this object to help support their transition into the dark and scary world as they see it.

Usually once the children reaches toddler stage these attachment diminished and though they appreaicte having te objects around, it is not imperative. But if from the need for security the need has moved on to more attachment then a problem has asrisen and we as parents need to find a way extricate ourselves from this messy situation.

1.    Whether your child sucks their thumb, hugs a blanket or is attahcned to their binky, do not forcefully take them away from yoru child. Understand that in their little world these things are very important and the eventual break up has to be a slow one.

2.    Teasing them about using soothers or carrying around a dirty blanket doesnotsolev matters and cuase your child give up the riduculied object. Infact it only confuses them more and the stressful situation will only force them to cling on more tightly to the every object to want to get rid of.

3.    Lets limits on where yoru child can take or use their comforting object. From only in the house to only in your room, gradually reduced the usage time. Incases like sucking the thumb, you might ave to tape up the thumbs and tell them that they can only do it at certain times anscertaib places, of course this not going to be easy on the get go, but talk to your toddler, make it a game and let the slow weangin begin.

4.    Some children constantly cling to on their comforting object throughout the whole day. In these cases keep their hands busy, give them puzzles, activities, tous to play with that will help them forget their comfort buddies.

5.    Fill your child’s day with hugs for to have their comfort object is because they feel insecure and a hug from you will give them the constant reassurance they need in the big bad world.

From a child’s point of view their comfort buddies  are a need in their everyday lives, just like we need that cup of coffee to kick start our days. In our children eyes their days are long and scary and to have that friend always at your side helps shoo the baddies away, as my four year old  says. So we must be patient, we must not be hasty with our requiremnts, the parenting race is nebvr won at a fast pace, but istead more suceesfully when ridden in a more slow and steady mode. Happy Parenting!

By Mayuri Jayasinghe