Expected Qualities..

May 05 2016.

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What Men Want In Their Future Wives! 

It is the most difficult task on earth; to find out what a man is thinking. Most men are of few words. They rarely express their feelings or sometimes even what they want. (I am not being stereotypical… but it’s true!) So when my friends responded to me the way they did I was taken by surprise. Some answers were expected but most of them surprised me. 

“She should be able to give me this thought "there comes my queen" when she walks towards me.” – Methunshankar Suduweli Kondage 

Well my friend Methun is quite the romantic, but I understand what he means. We all want someone who will excite you and someone who leave you wondering how I even got him/her to spend the rest of their lives with me. 

Remember what is important to you may not be as important to someone else. This is why I truly believe there is someone for everyone. 

Here’s a list of qualities (According to a bunch that are in their 20’s) that men look for in their future wives! 

Be Understanding And Supportive 

Now this list is in no particular order but this quality was on everyone’s list! They all want someone who will understand them and support them in achieving their dreams and goals. Someone who will love them for who they are. 

Be In It For The Long Ride 

Be honest and faithful. It doesn’t get simpler than that. We all obviously want someone who will be with you till the end and of course not cheat on you. In a world where more marriages fail than make it to the end of the line, I was so happy to find out that they too want to work on their relationships despite how hard it will get. 

Share Same Beliefs 

Now this may not always be religious. (Although for most it was) They all understand that it is very difficult for two people with contrasting beliefs to survive. You can’t help who you fall in love with but to build a successful marriage it is important to share somewhat similar world views. 

Kind And Helpful 

This made it to all of their lists and I was so proud to have them as my friends. They all wanted someone who is kind and who will go out of their way to help others. 

Able To Defend Herself 

“She should know how to keep limits with people and defend herself because the world is so cruel these days you know” – Mirhaj Mohothar 

As much as guys love to be all macho and protect their girlfriends/wives, they also want someone who can take care of themselves. This may not always mean physically. They want their wives to be able to stand up on their own and not be taken advantage of. So basically have a strong personality. 

Comfort Me 

“Be my best friend and pick me up when I am feeling down.” – Dwane Nash 

This is something that we all want. Our spouse to be our best friend. When you have the worst day you would want to come back to a loving home where your wife/husband will listen to your miseries and do their best to cheer you up. And more importantly you would want someone who knows you enough to know what will lighten your mood. 

Independent And Educated 

“I wish my future wife to be an educated and a strong, independent person. She shouldn’t marry me because she needs to. She should marry me because she wants to.” – Firnaz Najimudeen 

I agree with this 100%! Every women should be educated and aware of what is happening around her. She should be up to date with the way society works. And I personally believe that a woman should be financially independent as well. And I think most men admire a career-oriented woman who can think for herself and have goals of her own. 

Be A Good Cook 

“Be a food lover” – Christopher Wijesinghe 

One thing I have learnt over the years is that guys have endless pits as stomachs. So naturally they would want someone who can fill it up. Who wouldn’t want to have good homemade food? And boys let me remind you that nothing is more attractive than a man who can cook or at least be willing to help out in the kitchen. 

Enjoy Each Other’s Company 

“I should be able to sit down and have a conversation with her and not feel the time going.” – Vishwa Steinwall 

Who doesn’t want someone that they can talk to till the early hours of the morning? Someone they truly enjoy the company of. (After all you are going to spend the rest of your lives with them!) Someone they can share a good meal and conversation with. And since we experience a lot of power cuts, it is really important that you find someone that you enjoy being around! 

Fun Loving And Adventurous 

“She must love to go on adventurous trips, like scuba diving or camping” – Yasun Chanuka 

You know how we blame the guys that they always want to hang out with their bros, it may just be our fault! Most guys want to share their love for adventure with their wives! For instance my friend Yasun is a diver, so he obviously would love to find a wife who enjoys the same or at least many trips to the beach! Being spontaneous together with being adventurous appeared on most lists… Ladies it is time to fall in love with the outdoors and well it's good for you too! 

Be Musical 

To be honest being musical and being able to sing or play an instrument may have made this list because most of my friends are musicians. Anyway I think being artistic or creative is attractive. And it is even better if you share this talent or interest! 

Be Social 

This is not good news for introverts like myself, but it definitely makes a lot of sense. They want someone who will get along with their friends and colleagues. Someone who is a good host and is able to carry herself. 

Have A Good Fashion Sense 

This came as a surprise to me! But most of them want a girl who is able to dress for the occasion and more importantly be decent and fashionable at the same time. Someone who can leave a good impression. 

Love My Family 

“My siblings and I; when we get together, we are like kids, it’s just crazy. Their spouses are also the same. So she should be able to join in and enjoy.” – Hasitha Herath 

It’s true what they say, when you marry someone you marry their family. So it is important that you are able to get along with them and more importantly love and care for them as your own. This is also a quality that made it to most of my friend’s list, thus highlighting how important it is! 

Points Out My Mistakes 

Ladies, this is our cue! But it does not mean that we are allowed to be overly critical. Shouldn’t we take a moment and appreciate the fact that guys want to better themselves too. And that they are open to listen and improve themselves. Remember no one likes to be at the receiving end of whose mistake it is. 

Shorter Than Me 

“I was always on the lookout for a short girl. Since I'm tall I always wanted to carry my GF/potential wife when I hug her, just a guy thing I guess.” – Dinush Thyagarajan 

Well this is one of those unspoken qualities that men look for. Well to be fair don’t we always look for guys that are taller than us? Not that size and shape should matter, but admit it that’s what we all want. 

Animal Lover 

I must point out some specified as to whether she should be a dog lover or cat lover. You may think it’s not important but trust me it is. I would rather be a spinster than live in a house of lizards or worse cats! 

Someone Human 

“Someone who's flawed and human as she can be, but have an attitude to grow and become better as an individual and as a mom/wife/friend.” – Yohan Perera 

See they don’t want us to be perfect, they just want us to be human and the best version of ourselves that we can be. And remember to accept their flaws and love them despite too. And I believe that your weaknesses will be counter acted by their strengths and you will share a good relationship as you complement each other. 

By Jithendri Gomes



0 Comments

  1. Bipzz says:

    How come I m don't have a BF .. having more than 80% of what guys looking for..lolzzzzz..

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