Full Name - Randika Doling (née Cooray)
Hometown - Moratuwa
Status - Married
Birthday - 12/11/1985
Idols - Nick Vujicic (Ah! I admire his thinking style)
Passions - To change the perception about disability in Sri Lanka (including people with disability and how they see themselves)
Favourite Colour- Initially Blue (think it’s because of the patriotism for my ‘house colour’ at school). Now it depends on my mood - yellow, green, red and brown. Never purple (yuck!)
You took part in the World Para Badminton, how was the experience?
It was indeed one of the best experiences to be part of - at a world class arena (with it being held in Stoke Mandeville - the birthplace of the Paralympic Movement) and with the world's best players. It never really sunk in until then the sheer size of this event and how the popularity of the sport has grown since the announcement in last October that badminton will make its Paralympic debut in Tokyo 2020 - there was a massive buzz around the event and I was indeed very blessed to be a part of it. It was my first World Championships and I was absolutely nervous during every match but felt like a superstar after winning a bronze in singles and winning a silver by beating the second best doubles pair in women’s doubles with Nina Kersten who I met for the first time. Most of all I was so glad that my parents were there to share the experience with me.
Tell me about the award.
It’s not just one but two shinny and heavy medals. It was a proud moment for me for being the only entrant from Sri Lanka in this tournament to bring honour to my country. It felt right when they announced me as ‘Randika Doling representing Sri Lanka’. I wish I had a team to celebrate it with me.
How has the feedback been?
Soon after my win I wrote to the National Sri Lankan Paralympic Committee who wished me on my success by email. Nothing thereafter. Felt like it was just a ‘pat on my back’ after giving ‘my all’. My husband, family and friends tell me how proud they are of me and what an achievement I have brought for Sri Lanka. To tell you the truth I don’t feel the excitement I had when I was on the podium that day. I feel like I have been treated like a child who took his/her first step. Patronizing - after all how far can I go, I am disabled.
Would it have been different if I was an able bodied person winning a medal at a World Badminton event?
Well definitely not in England or even in India, because many of their success stories were covered by media and many sources. Thanks to my friends and family for helping me to share my success.
Tell me about your family.
Born to a middle class family - I have two older sisters who still tell me I am the spoilt one (although this is 100% true - I don’t want to agree on this - I tell them Lokki (oldest sister) is my Ammi’s favourite because she was the one and Chutti (middle sister) is Thathie’s favourite because she is the tomboy and I was just left behind. Ammi is the rock of our family - who holds us all together. Thathie had dreams for each of us to be educated and worked hard to help us achieve this. They have taught me the meaning of ‘family’. Ruwanthi my middle sister, has always been my buddy / my partner in crime. She would know my adventures and breaking of family rules. She will always check if I locked the door and reached home safely. Rozaine, my older sister took a firmer stand with me when she said that I can live greater than my being if I believe and dream with all my heart. When I was 15 we made a bet, Lokki said I will find Mr. Right and get married through a relationship. The negative self inside me was certain that was never going to be true and bet Rs. 15,000 (which was quite a lot of money that time) with Chutti being the witness. I still owe Lokki Rs. 15,000.
I was lucky to have got a balance of strengths from my family; an undying force of equality, understanding and love from my parents, one to hug and cry with and one to say believe in yourself, get up and get going’. And of course my husband, Paul - my first love. He has supported me to accept my difference and see the positive side of it. Always believing in me and supporting me to reach my dreams. Whenever I feel I have been rejected, together we find another pathway to take a step closer in achieving that dream. The man who made me lose the bet to my sister and who proved me wrong.
How is married life treating you?
Marriage is a blessing. He gets on well with my family and friends, likes spicy food and cricket - what more can you ask from him? We both have the similar humour and see ourselves different than disabled. So nothing stops us from achieving anything.
How was school life?
I studied at a convent and I know my parents fought hard to get to the same school as my sisters as the school was worried if I will be able to cope the 1 ½ hour journey to and from school. My parents never gave up and appealed until they accepted me. My mother tells me that she was so nervous of my first day at school - how everyone would react to me. I had waved at my mum and joined a group of girls and started chatting. It had instantly made my mum realize that I was going to be just fine. I had / have an army of friends who take care of me and stood up for me at school when I had those on and off comments. Can you believe they altered the game ‘red robber’ for me? I was always included and never saw myself different from them and I don’t think they saw me different from them. I owe them as their acceptance has helped me to become who I am today. Like my mother reminds me, they didn’t have to choose me as their friend after all.
Being you would have attracted attention, how did you overcome it?
When I was young I cried and took it mostly off my family. I had a temper (my sisters would say, that I still do). I was not confident enough to stand up to myself probably as I couldn’t accept myself. Life was easy for me at school, home and when I was with my cousins - everyone knew me and accepted me. When real life struck me, it hit me hard. The usual name callings, laughing, staring, nudging at each other still goes on. What I can not take is when people take photographs. It can annoy me when I am tired but as my husband says asking them not to take photos wouldn’t stop them from taking pictures of us. So I let them take. If I have the opportunity I would move seats or zone out by listening to my music. As negative as these experiences may sound, it has helped me to become who I am today. I will carry on.
What does empowerment mean to you?
They said that I won’t be able to do a sport because I am not fast enough, I will only find a job at the circus, I won’t be married and will be a burden for my parents. I proved them all wrong. I am a world number 4 in badminton (just one point behind the number 3), I am happily married and we live in our own place and I have a job that I enjoy. Be the person who you want to be and not what the society wants you to be.
How and where do you find inspiration?
I find inspiration through meeting families with children with SEN and many other disabilities. This is why I love my job. Nick Vujicic’s biography keeps me going. My husband, my family, cousins and friends love and our bonding reminds me how blessed I am today.
What values are you committed to?
A lot. Remember I was taught at a convent. Family, faith, hope, encouragement, respect, inclusion, equality, compassion, appreciation, understanding, open minded and many more.
What dreams and goals inspired you to succeed?
To tell you the truth I didn’t believe that I would achieve what I have achieved today. Society saw me as someone who is disabled- They said I can’t do it and actually I believed them. However my family had faith in me they had big dreams for me. Simple things that I thought that I will never be able to do started happening to me e.g. I started to travel by myself, I started to use a cash machine by myself. As petty it may sound I felt like an individual and not someone who society wanted me to be. I started becoming independent and believing in myself. I started achieving simple dreams - going to university, finding a boyfriend. Now I don’t want to give up without succeeding all my dreams.
What would you say to people who believe in calling names and underestimating talent?
Somewhere down in your life everyone will find something difficult to do. Maybe you won’t be able to use both hands to skin off a rambutan because you fractured one of your arms. Would that make you disabled? How would you feel if I laugh at you for trying so hard?
You go to a foreign country and you don’t know their language, you use a lot of action and visuals to get your message across and everyone seeing this laughs at you rather than trying to understand what you are trying to say? You are different because you are not the norm. Think before any action. Don’t underestimate us. We were born like this and we have overcome and learnt different ways. While it probably takes you 10 minutes to skin off a rambutan for an amputee it’ll probably just take 2 minutes. While you try to hard to get your message across to someone who does not speak the same language as you it’ll probably take a person with hearing impairment 2 minutes as they have lived and learned how to get their message across as they don’t speak. So don’t underestimate us. See us for who we are. I bet you I can go through a hula hoop faster than any of you.
What would you say was your biggest challenge?
I had a cushiony life in Sri Lanka where everyone helped me and after all I didn’t have to speak upto myself, I had my family or a friend around. Moving to England I knew I didn’t have Ammi and knew that Lokki is not going to overprotect me. After my first week in London, Lokki gave me the bus pass and said go to university by yourself. Aaaahhh! I argued with her, told on her to Ammi. Given that Ammi wasn’t here there was nothing much she could do other than call Lokki and scold her for letting me go by bus alone. I missed my bus stop couple of times as I couldn’t ring the bell because it was high and I didn’t have the confidence to ask anyone to ring it for me or didn’t have anything for lunch as I didn’t fancy anything on the bottom shelf in the shop and everything I liked were out of my reach and I didn’t want to ask anyone as it would highlight my difference. On top of the Rs. 15,000 I owe Lokki today for letting me experience this by myself and helping to become who I am today.
Being a person with achondroplasia, what would you like to tell the world?
I am only short in size and would probably take 20 minutes when it only takes you 10 minutes to walk somewhere. I have aspirations and dreams like you have. I can think and take decisions and I am an individual.
What do you feel about Sri Lanka?
The culture, society, language and social etiquette, manners is who I am today - I am Sri Lankan.
You did your degree in Special Educational Needs and Psychology at university and found the Dwarf Sports Association UK (DSAuk), what made you choose this path?
At 3rd year university we had to think about a subject for our dissertation. Nothing interested me given that everybody wanted to work on ‘special educational needs’. I wanted to do something different but I didn’t know what. I had a wonderful tutor who said why I don’t do about my disability. Given that it was quite a sensitive subject to me at that time, I wondered why she said that. Two weeks when I was at my friends, there was a documentary on dwarf sports. At first although the thought of me meeting a person who looks like me for the first time created a great anxiety in me soon after I thought WoW sports for small people! I started my sporting career at the age of 22 and came out with a first class on my dissertation BINGO!
Fun!
What was your favourite food when you were a child?
Pizza (My ammi makes yummy pizzas)
What’s the #1 most played song on your iPod?
Want to want me - Jason Derulo (I know very cheesy)
What is one of your favourite quotes?
Everything has a reason.
What’s your favourite indoor activity?
Chatting.
What chore do you absolutely hate doing?
Putting the clothes away and washing rice (absolutely hate it ask my Chutti).
What is your favourite form of exercise?
Pilates.
What’s your least favourite mode of transportation?
Boat (I am absolutely scared of deep water hence the reason why I can not swim).
What sound do you love?
The sound of the rain.
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